One guy was facing flak for posting this quoted joke on social networking site, “If sex without wife’s consent is rape, then by this logic, isn’t spending husband’s money by the wife without his consent Robbery???”
On the face of it, nothing wrong with this statement. Obviously if a woman is spending husband’s money without his consent, it would amount to stealing (assuming the wife has taken money out of his wallet / taken money given for other purposes spent on own). FYI, neither of the crimes are reported unless there is a separation / divorce involved.
However, mine & other women’s, who couldn’t gulp down this as a joke (yeah poor sense of humour & blah blah blah), concern was are men thinking sex without wife’s consent is not rape? Both are crimes of different degrees. How do you even compare raping a woman with self indulgent wife? Why do men have to be so defensive of rape to resort to such cheap humour?
Physical Intimacy is a necessary ingredient of a happy married life and differences regarding those should be sorted out through communication and not violence. Would men laugh this off as a joke, if it was told by their fathers in context of their mothers?
From the interactions on the joke, one thing I observed was, since women are crying hoarse for attention to rapes, men feel crimes against them are going unnoticed. We get your point. But is this the way to gather attention? Instead of branding women fighting for their rights as feminist bitches, why don’t men utilise their energy to do something against crime against men?
It is not women’s fault if they are doing something about their plight & you are not getting your share of attention. Everyone is fighting their own battles. You need not demean others to glorify yours.
Rape is a serious issue. It is faced by men, women & children equally, globally. Do not let anyone think raping is ok by indulging in such humour, specially if you are an influential person. That’s what all we women ask. Not for women’s sake. But for the sake of humanity.
its not that everyone enjoys these joke. sometimes men forget to contemplate that what a woman, man or a child who have had borne this atrocity. they can’t identify themselves with this particular situation. What we need is more blogs like this one, may be more soft(not that this one wasn’t soft enough ;p ) on the listener(male) because men have great egos about there masculinity. Its not due to their lack of knowledge or empathy but its just the way it is, hardwired in our DNA.
Good post Laddoo. Keep up the good work. 🙂
Totally agree with you Gairoo & these jokes make men believe it is not that atrocious crime. Just like we respect cancer & never joke about it, we need a respect for rape. Of course there are exceptions, men who are sensitive & understanding enough to not enjoy these jokes. I was reading the comments thread & not a single man slammed that guy for this joke. In fact those who commented were of the opinion, it should be forgotten as it is “just a joke”
I hope this makes at least one person think & stop forwarding such type of jokes. 🙂
Thanks a lot for your feedback. Means a lot 🙂
Hello didi… This is Dharmesh Rudakiya (following you in Twitter by handle name of Gujjukathiawadi)
Reading your blog for the first time and I just felt that this is very serious issue regarding mentality of the mens specially in India. Not only in our culture sex is considered as dirty but even talking about it also insult of religions, moreover as far as your blog is concern, people of India don’t considered a human who are rape victims. This is our mentality of our Indians. And the cases of killing child women and the sexual harassment and the political leaders are talking about women empowerment sounds so silly. I can write pages on that but due to exams I Could not reply you properly.
I hope you’ll like my viewpoints on your blog. Expecting replys of your. Thank you. Take care, stay safe, keep distance from such animals.
Thanks Dharmesh for taking time to read & also to share your views. 🙂
It is not only India, it is a global crime, men, women & children are assaulted daily & we need to create awareness about this issue. Let our children know rape is a very bad thing & not to take it lightly. We need more people like you 🙂